I’m sure you’ve run into them before. The joy thieves live and work with us. They habitually steal the wonderment, happiness and yes, joy, from our lives. Sadly, they often do it to themselves as well.
They have giveaway opening lines:
• “What a great piece of jewelry! Too bad you don’t have the right dress to wear with it!” (Of course, you’re wearing a dress you think goes great with it)
• “Really, you actually like living there? Interesting!” (About the home or location you’ve just excitedly chosen for yourself.)
• “You lost four pounds! How wonderful. Now remember not to lose too fast or your skin will get saggy!” (This wonderful piece of advice is usually given just as you’ve managed to fit into a new pants size.)
• “Great car! Of course, I could never have one of those because…”( And the reasons are often too numerous to casually ignore, but are given to explain why this oh-too-precious individual couldn’t possibly make do with your cute, but completely unacceptable vehicle.)
If you’re quick to catch on, you can avoid repetitions of this type of interaction by simply refusing to engage. Don’t tell Madeline-the-Magpie that you are wearing a size smaller. Don’t give Rod-the-Downtrodden a reason to speculate about your car by never revealing which one is yours. Unfortunately, this is a lot of work – the suppression of your naturally bubbly personality. There’s another, very workable, way to trim the sails of your joy snatcher.
A simple, well-placed comment like - “Oh, really? It’s a good thing I really don’t care what people think, huh?” - will often do the trick, and a side-benefit is that they are left speechless. Such a blessing.
The most important thing is to keep on trucking. Don’t let the joy stealers walk away with your happiness. Dwelling on their negativity can be worse that the actual comments they make. So, let it go.
Great advice. Now, I’m off to try to take it myself. I have a joy stealer to contend with in the next few minutes. Don’t worry, I can handle her.
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